Day 19 (of 31 days of free writing)

You would think that after all these years I would have a better understanding of my body. My excuse is that my body has changed a lot over time, most especially in the past two years. At times I have been enamored of my body’s ability to adapt given the demands that have been placed on it. Yet there has always been some mystery that eludes me. I have a sense that despite my search for understanding neither doctors or the books I have read have fully enlightened me. I have peered at CAT scan results and MRI images as doctors pointed and said, “See this, right here…” I nod as if I understand, when in fact it all looks like a confusing mess to me.

This week I am filling out the forms to donate my body to a medical university after I die. I have wanted to do this for a long time but it has only been in the past few years that I qualified. I wish I could be a ghost on the ceiling to look inside and see what the medical students observe. I imagine that I will be a very interesting corpse.